FUCK!!!

I checked my weight when I got up this morning
and I was 193...
then I had 2 bottles of Sunny D; 440 cals.
1 cookie; 250
Total Cals: 690

I got home and I was 195.4 (FUCK)

Then I was so depressed about it I ate

2 meat balls; 370
3 peices of bread; 239
whole bowl of ceaser salad; 222
1 cup of milk; 130

Total: 1651 cals today...

I attempted to purge some of it, but I didn't eat it probably
so nothing would come up.
Instead I just chugged a whole much of Milk of Magnesia...
Currently with all the water and food and milk in me, I'm
197!
Why is it so fucking hard for me to get out of the 90ies.
This is unbelievable...
I wish my dad was out tonight so I could work out a bit...
but I can already feel the laxatives working and I'll properly
be running to the bathroom all night...

fuck my life.

Sam;;
-PeaceEZ